Friday, September 26, 2008

3 times....yeah....

yahoo........finally......
during PJK on wednesday......i finally achieved my target....i did it. i didn't think i could but i did it. After so long trying and tiring myself out i finally did it. For me, it was not an easy task to do. i struggled a lot. But the main thing is .....i did it...yeah....One thing i learnt is that no matter what....we must keep on trying our best.....no matter how hard it is. It is better to fail and know you have tried your best than to not try at all. But i did it.....i'm sooo happy.

i was standing there in the field....waiting for my chance...i knew it would come...i just had to wait. i could feel the adrenaline rush, the wind blowing against my face, the eyes of students looking and staring trying to guess if i would make it. i had to do it, i need to do it. this is not really the typical kind of thing i would be doing. usually i don't play sports. but i should at least try...... rite?

and then it came. my chance, my hope. i reached for it, i gave it my all...................
YES! i did it. i succeeded. yahoo....i finally did it. i finally.......



touched the football 3 times...........(pathetic rite?)

Friday, September 19, 2008

dreams.....

Dreams. Are they just dreams or glimpses of the future. What makes dreams feel so real? Dreams can mean the dreams we have when we sleep or the dreams we want to achieve in the future. The dreams that come when we sleep....well, cant really say much about them. But the dreams we have for ourselves is a whole story to itself.

There are times when dreams seem sooo near. But there are times when dreams feel sooo far away....that you can never achieve and reach your dreams no matter how hard you try. Sometimes i wish there was no gravity, so that i can just fly into the sky and reach for the stars. But to my disappointment......my wish will stay as just a wish.

I don't really have an ambition. I can't imagine what i would be doing in ten or twenty years. Sometimes i get a hunch on something and then realize later that it is just not possible. i'm not good enough and i will never be able to reach it. i mean......who am i trying to kid. it feels very depressing at times.

I have no idea whether i will be able to reach my goals and dreams...i guess only time will tell. But i hope everyone will achieve their dreams. Then maybe life wouldn't feel so complicated anymore.....

Friday, September 5, 2008

Just letting my mind wander......

I actually can't believe i am more than half way through form 4. I still feel like i just entered school. Next year..i will be a senior... Can't believe it. Time flies when you are having fun. But to come to think of it....time flies when you are not having fun too. I realize how short life is...and that is why we should always be ourselves. Like i heard in a movie...life is too short to be someone else. What is the point of pretending to be someone else?

I realize that we can never turn back time. We can never go back. We can never change the things we want to change. we can never go back and take the other road. We just have to live with it. I realize that i can never change what people think of me...no matter how hard i try. That i can never know what people think of me. But does it really matter....what people think of me? It matter's more what i think of myself. I realized that i can never change others as well. no matter how hard i try... the choice is still theirs. All i can do is tell them how i feel but it will always come down to them.

16 years of my life and i have had my ups and downs. Nobody can ever say that their life is perfect. I am soooo fortunate to have people who helped me through the rough times. Even now...i am still going through some problems. Sometimes i feel like giving up or running away from everything but i still have friends who are always there for me.

Just this week...i asked my friend " why are relationships so complicated? " It feels so hard to breathe sometimes when relationships are all tangled up or going through a storm. But maybe relationships aren't as complicated as it seems. Maybe we are the ones who complicate it. Sometimes i wonder why these things are happening to me? But maybe these things are supposed to happen so that i can learn from them and grow stronger.

I hope that these tangled up problems will soon be un-tangled because i don't think i can take much more....